Wednesday, May 30, 2007


digression... or rather, distraction... sungie?


*Takes deep breath*


Forget about all those irritating stuff, I'm currently playing SHE's [听袁惟仁弹吉他] in my head over and over again. Actually I thought the rapping part was really not well done, compared to Shinhwa's it's really nothing; but the chorus tune is simple yet addictive, liked it quite alot.


Now I'm mass downloading 1 litre of tears screencaps (about 100mb++). I'm planning to mass-photoshop tomorrow so that I can drown all my sorrows in photoshop. I haven't watched this show before, but I've heard that it's really touching. Maybe when I have time sometime I would watch it, although I think this day wouldn't be too soon. Ah well...


Sungie's voice is sooooooo amazing! sooooooo dreamy! sooooooo sweet! *dies*


(well of course, fangirlism. you should've gotten used to it by now.)



Nini @ 5:46 PM


totally screwed up


I finally went to ece today. Spent the whole afternoon decoding the software, which actually was quite interesting, but it's so confusing that at the end of the day nothing went into my mind at all. Then a student from the department came and say hello. He shook my hands are seemingly refused to let go. OMG pervert. After that I'm totally freaked out by him. Maybe he was just being friedly, but sorry, I felt bizarre. And I couldn't really understand the things he said because he has very serious indian accent.


Why does xiangyi meet interesting people at her RI while I encounter perverts?Goodness.


Now I'm very troubled over making choices. I have to make a decision on which project I want to do. My mentor offered me a lab-based project at IMRE which I would be more interested in but somehow I still find it hard to come to a decision. I should have happily agreed to it but something just tells me that it's not right. I just feels bad towards my mentor because now I'm really sure that he can tell that I'm not very interested in the project he proposed. I think somehow he feels a little... disappointed? The other problem is that those professors always give such a vague description of the projects and how am I supposed to choose when I don't really understand what both projects are about? And I don't want to irritate them by keep on asking questions on what the project is about. It's not that ray-tracing isn't interesting, but I just don't feel productive when I'm doing it.


And I definitely don't have the luxury of time to think about this problem slowly. Someone enlighten me!!!



Nini @ 4:40 PM

Monday, May 28, 2007


estatic... or not


I had satay yesterday. Satay was great, it made me very very happy. Although the meat was a bit tough, I was really contented.


I think I totally screwed the chem varied assessment today. The molecule that we presented actually wasn't supposed to be explained using the VSEPR theory. OMG I didn't think we have hope of doing well at all. Haix...


On a happier note, I received a email from my mentor today. He offered me another lab-based project at IMRE. I have to attend a course and take an exam though. It would be a great opportunity, because it means I would not need to do computing anymore. Haha. I think he can tell that I'm not really interested in computing and I'm starting to feel bad for ponning ece last friday. Oh well, I really dunno what to say, he's really a nice person. Now I don't couldn't even reply his email because I didn't go ece.


And it seems like my post is becoming more depressing. Okay, how about... Jing Xian's jelly cake was very nice. ^^


Lastly, Kangta's voice is so very sexy, haha. *zooms off to watch Shinhwa vids*



Nini @ 6:04 PM

Saturday, May 26, 2007


mismatched


It feels disgusting living a life that forces you to do things that you dread everyday. It's especially painful when your mind is constantly harassed by the things you have to do and by people telling you to do the things you have to do.


Perhaps it's because I've been to busy, and that I'd looked busy since the start of the year that my parents can't stand, or rather find it weird that I'm sitting in front of the computer doing things other than homework. They seem to have forgotten that I had used to do this not long before. I don't want to be doing constructive things at anytime. Please, I want, and desperately need to rest. And I don't want them to be walking past the study room, putting up a bad pretence that they are not spying on me. It's extremely irritating, I would rather they leave me alone.


"Sometimes, the sheer exertion of living drove a person beyond their limits."
--- TIME June 4, 2007


It's true; it's really tiring when you are trying too hard to live. They wouldn't understand, because they are not I.



Nini @ 3:18 PM

Monday, May 21, 2007


all the regrets in life.


YAY my dad came back! And NO my mum went to Europe. I wanna go too, and if I haven't got the research project I would have be gone by now. An one week trip to Europe sounds absolutely pleasurable. I haven't found any reason to be interested in my research project still, and I'm starting to dread going to NUS on thursday. Haix. For the past few days (before she left this morning) I could hear my mum bragging about how beautiful Munich is while I was eating, while I was watching tv, and while I was dreaming. Can't stand it. Someday I would go on my own holiday all over the world, that is, when I've earned enough money.


It's a very weird feeling, knowing that it's already the holidays but I wouldn't be able to spend it like any other holidays in the past. If there wasn't this research project I would have happily looked forward to this holiday, especially when going to school has really worn me out. I don't mind studying, but I really can't stand waking up at 5 in the morning and sleeping for at the best 5 hours everyday.


And today I almost walked from kap to school with Leng. Almost, because halfway through I decided that I couldn't take it anymore and took a bus home. The sun was in an exceptionally good mood today and my sweat glands were also very excited. The walk was long and arduous.


But on the other hand, I wouldn't have mind at all if I was walking with Sungie. I would be too busy drooling over admiring his adorable face to be bothered about anything else, hoho. Sungie is simply too adorable. XD


And I managed to pay for one of my enrichment courses today. Three more to go, and I'm starting to feel that this is becoming a problem that I would never be able to solve.



Nini @ 4:47 PM

Thursday, May 17, 2007


warning : excessive fangirlism ahead


It's a bad time to write my blog I know, because now my mind's full of SUNGIE. OMG.


SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE SUNGIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111one


OMG IMA GOING CRAZY!!!!! SUNGIE'S TOO ADORABLE!!! OMG I LOVE HIM!!!! OMGOMG!!! *DIES*



Nini @ 9:00 PM

Wednesday, May 16, 2007


*pulls my hair*


I'm stressed. Stressed like I've never been before.


There's so much things to do, and suddenly I realised that I can't take it anymore.
I'm eating less than ever, and my eye bags are dragging on the floor. Haix...


Now I'm thinking whether I should have joined the STAR researchin the first place. It's sad to say that I'm totally not interested in what I'm supposed to do at all. My mentor talked alot on how he feels that the project is interesting but it just doesn't appeal to me, not at all. Hopefully I would be more interested in it after I started on it or else I don't think I could do a good project at all. And it is really very important to me. I don't want to waste my precious June holiday for nothing. And mentor actually is a nicer person than he looks; or rather he doesn't look as creepy as his photo. He's just skinny and with little hair. And he is not balding at one spot, his hair is homogeneously diluted (wonder if it's right to say it like that...). But he's really a nice person, considering that he sent me to the busstop after one boring morning spent in NUS. If he didn't I'll probably still be lost in NUS. Oh yes, NUS is ridiculously huge. And just because he's a nice person, I don't want to disappoint him by doing a poor project; although somehow I think he realised I wasn't very interested. It's really hard to fake interest when you really isn't. Haix...


I started mugging bio after I came home from NUS (although I slept for 3 hours in between). Now I'm wondering where I'd put the information because it's definitely not in my brain. I still couldn't find it. Maybe I'll sleep with Ho Yin Kiong under my head tonight. I can really imagine how I'll fail my bio test tomorrow. Haix... But on a happier note, my bio teacher is not Khoo, and Zach Lim probably won't mark it. Ahaha.


I need more sleep and more sleep and more sleep. So off I go...



Nini @ 10:10 PM

Thursday, May 10, 2007


a ridiculous post


Dear Auntie Dawn, the President,


I'm a troubled fangirl. I'm addicted to my idol OMG. I must listen to his songs at least once a day. I repeat his songs over and over again. I must watch his videos everyday. My face goes closer and closer to the screen and I drool all over the place. His voice makes me faint, and his smile makes me go, "OMGOMG I WUV EUUUU!!!!!" and bangs my head against the table. I can't stop doing this. I think I'm going crazy. I laugh madly on the bus when I think of him and the auntie sitting beside me thought I was a pervert and changed seats! I can't concentrate in lessons and I dream of him every night. My eye bags are getting worse. I think I'm having double personalities; the crazy cheekopek living inside me. I'm going crazy!!! HALP ME AUNTIE DAWN!!! YOU ARE MA ONLY HOPEEE!!!!!


teh-troubled-fangirl






For the reply from Auntie Dawn, refer to Auntie Dawn's column today!



Nini @ 9:39 PM

Wednesday, May 09, 2007


And then there were none... crackers!


Current status : Munching DELUXE crackers


They're super nice really. Starting on my 3rd packet now. Crackers + Yakult = LOVE.
Wonder where I can fit in my dinner later...


Doing my econs (dread) tutorial and slacking more than ever. Mindlessly scribbling some word onto the paper, and totally forgetting that there's something called the eraser.
And I'm still wondering if I should call my research mentor. But he looks so frightening, what if he eats me up? Oh no! I think... I shall call him tomorrow...


Life isn't easy, really.




A picture featuring a bunch of Robos (Roborovski Dwarf Hamsters) to brighten up your day. They are so cute OMG. Just wanna cuddle a bunch of them in my arms. Kaaa.


I miss my hamsters so much. Although I wouldn't mind having a bunny too. XD



Nini @ 5:13 PM

Monday, May 07, 2007


New Layout


New layout! Yay yay!
Finally a new layout. I've been wanting a new layout for ages and not having any time to make one. It's a black layout again hoho. FYI the foxes are not black. It's supposed to be white and orange but it just looks black after I desaturated the pictures. Anyways the original photos of the foxes are this and this


I felt so happy making this layout because I'd never had so much inspiration in a while. The pictures of the foxes were taken by me on my trip to Hokkaido. They are so beautiful, a pity that I couldn't touch them because they were not tamed. Hokkaido is really a great place, with great food and cute waiters, hehe. Really want to go there again.


Now that I've finally finished making this layout, it's time to do my homework (not that there's much time though). I've spent the whole day on this layout. I totally dread writing my gp essay because the topic is as dull and boring as it can be. Luckily I don't need to go to school today, because then I get to skip the double period of gp and maths and econs tutorial, whaha.


Yesterday I dreamt of getting stabbed to death. I ran and ran and ran but somehow I still got caught by whoever. I was really scared when I woke up. People say that if you remember your dreams then it won't come true, is it true? Because I definitely doesn't want to be stabbed to death, no no.


And I don't want to bleed to death as well. I haven't gotten rid of that disturbing mozzie yet, grrr.



Nini @ 9:08 PM


*killing mozzies like there's no tomorrow*


I'm in a killing mood.
I've been bitten more than 10 times for the past 2 days.
I swear I'm gonna make sure that I'll deal with that mozzie (if I ever see it flying near me again) in such a way it wouldn't wish it was born. RARR.
But no, I don't have the time to go hunting for it at present. *sprays baygon all over the place*


And I'm suddenly reminded of the advertisement I see at the bus stop everyday :
If it breed, you will bleed (or something like that)


This marks the start of the battle between [killer mozzie] and [me and my dad].



Nini @ 1:30 PM

Saturday, May 05, 2007


incoherence


It's weird to be living in this world. Sometimes I really feel that I am a lucky person, and that there's god looking after me. But I am tired. I am tired of always pretending to dread something that I would otherwise look forward so much. I feel cursed, because things would never go right when I look forward to it too much. The more truly I dread something, the better my life would get. Sometimes I would feel that I'm in control of my life, but it I really feel very tired. I really hope that I can happily look forward to any other day, so that life wouldn't be such a burden.


Don't think of suicide, never think of suicide. If you don't treasure your life, no one would. Think of all those innocent people who died in terrorist attacks, who lost their lives in the war. They have as much reason to live as you and me. They are just the unlucky bunch of people who are at the wrong place at the wrong time.


Why am I talking about things like this? As long as I have my family, my dearest friends, my comfortable bed, my endless supply of chocolate, and most importantly, my most adorable SUNGIE, nothing would be worst... or could it be?



Nini @ 9:17 PM