Saturday, March 27, 2010
I can't stop the terrible thoughts in my head.
I know I have a bad temper to start with. I know it's meaningless to get angry and agitated. But how can I remain calm and nonchalant when I have just lost one of the things I treasure the most? How can I simply take things in my stride?
But I just can't stop wanting to curse her into non-existence.
(If I do it a hundred times a day for a hundred days, will it come true?)
But it doesn't stop me hating her. It doesn't stop me hating myself either.
If I say I lost it, I'm forgiving her; if I say it got stolen, I'm forgiving myself.
And I forbid either.
God... Gods, whichever religion, make me the kind and forgiving human being that I should be.
(And while you're at it, damn her and her cursed pair of hands to the deepest depth of hell. Pretty please.)
Nini @ 11:25 PM